This is my so-called life

positive vibes

mysocalledlife28 — Wed, 12 Mar 2008 04:41:30 +0000

Sending postive vibes out into the universe

I will get a nice generous offer

they will be flexible with me in terms of schedule & start date

I will find a lovely place I love in a great city with a great roommate(s) or the perfect place by myself

I will make new great friends to spend my free time and have fun nites in the city with

I will succeed in my new program and be even more motivated b/c more of my peers will be there

The change will be a great, positive experience for me!

you can do it!

mysocalledlife28 — Fri, 07 Mar 2008 06:50:57 +0000

I have a hard thing to do tomorrow. It will be hard for me to let my employer and friend know that I am looking elsewhere and may have found something. They’re going to freak out and I’m going to have to deal with the consequences. But I remind myself that I am an adult and can deal with the consequences. I am not a child and what I am doing is, for myself as an adult, an important step in my career. It will be hard b/c it will be shocking, but better from me than someone else, and it might be a load off. I’m going to try not to think about it before I do it. I just know I will phrase it as that I know it’s a bad time and I wouldn’t do this intentionally but this opportunity came up and I think it’s a good opportunity and so I have to consider it. Then I will tell him about the job I applied for and went through the interview process and the next step for them is calling you and I wanted to let you know before they call you.
The way he takes it is his problem. I just need to remember that.
I also need to remember that I am a big girl and, no matter the consequences, I can handle it!

cost-benefit analysis

mysocalledlife28 — Tue, 04 Mar 2008 06:44:24 +0000

taking the new job

Benefits:

better pay
upward mobility
more responsibility
better job; more experience
promotion – good for career
get to try a different city
get out of my rut here and try something different
explore other marketing opps
a new social scene

Costs

leaving job – comfort zone
possiblity of getting promoted here at some point
leaving school friends
leaving work friends
finidng new apt
moving costs
breaking lease

not taking job

Benefits:

can stay in my school program with friends here
may get promoted here
no hassle of apt-hunting, moving, transferring

Costs:

may pass up good career opportunity
may pass up a promotion that could better my career and may not happen here
staying here in my misery for another how long?
others phasing out – do I want to be here?
continued depression
continued job search
getting stale with my life

my guy

mysocalledlife28 — Sun, 02 Mar 2008 17:30:21 +0000

Looks

tall and slender or slender/muscular
blondeish-brown hair
eye color doesn’t matter
clean-cut all american yet has a cultured and artistic side, yet stil interested in sports and outdoor activities
cute (did I need to say that?)

Personality:

laid back/casual but still ambitious and goal-oriented
he is successful in whatever career he has chosen or on the way to it, and has goals for himself
funny. have to be able to have fun with him. life is too short.
open & communicative
affectionate

My guy to me:

calms me down when I’m stressed
makes me laugh when I need it
doesn’t let me take life so seriously
pushes me to try new things

Hobbies

likes to be out and about
keeps active – sports or gym
Must like to travel

5 qualities he must have:

ability to have fun
ambitious & goal-oriented
likes to travel/try new things
values friends & family
sense of humor

5 things he must not have:

possessiveness/controlling
inability to communicate
laziness
stubborness
lying

in three years, I see myself…

mysocalledlife28 — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 23:38:07 +0000

as a marketing manager for a unique, smaller, boutique company. I’ll work between 40-50 hours per week and not more. I’ll have lots of responsibility yet my job will not have a lot of stress. I will love my job. It will give me creative freedom. It’s casual attire. It’s a boutique agency – I may have started it by myself or with close friends. I love the people I work with.

I live in a lovely condo in a nice area with lots of trees, good shopping, gourmet grocery stores, good restaurants and parks. It’s an affluent area. My condo is warm and comfy with colors like red and brown. It has 2 stories, a fireplace, maybe a dog and cat, stainless steel appliances and his and her bathrooms.

My husband is a hottie and loves to cook. He’s tall, with short spikey blonde-brown hair. He’s smart but doesn’t act like he knows it. He’s sweet and thoughtful, but also a man’s man. We go to symphony concerts as well as baseball games; Europe as well as Vegas. He makes me laugh, and makes me smile. He is successful in his career but doesn’t let it control his life. He is close to his family but doesn’t let them control his life. He is generous and loving, and I never question where I stand. We do things with our friends, but doing things with each other is the best. We met in a unique way; no one has a story like ours. He loves my friends and family but sees me as a jewel among regular stones. He supports me fully and we are equals. We like to travel. We are both driven and ambitious but don’t ever forget how to have a good time. We are fit and healthy running, biking, and overall being active.

We may have a child, or be planning to have one in the future.

Oh the places you’ll go

mysocalledlife28 — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 02:50:40 +0000

These are the places on my list to visit… which will be next?

Prague
Puerto Vallarta
Costa Rica
Argentina
Australia
New Zealand
Phoenix
Austin

What will be the next place?

let it roll

mysocalledlife28 — Tue, 26 Feb 2008 06:20:54 +0000

I think I’ve come to a solution with my guy problem. Or, problems in general.

Just not to get upset about the little things. That’s really what gets me every time. If someone doesn’t call on time or when I want, or return a call or email…that’s always when I get upset. So, why not just blow it off and not get upset?

There’s nothing really wrong with either (or any) of my guy sitches. We’re on even playing field, there’s no relationship to be had, we’re basically casual. So, why worry? Why even worry about responding them? It’s going to be all about me and what works for me. Cuz don’t you think they think like that? They’re boys, meaning they’re selfish.

My impatience doesn’t work well for me in situations like this. So, my new solution is to not sweat the small stuff. Basically, let it roll off my back.

stay away

mysocalledlife28 — Mon, 25 Feb 2008 23:46:11 +0000

Seriously. I just need to complain today to get it out of my system. I’m about ready to kill 2 people and they just happen to be related. One, of course, is the damn boy I have a crush on who I was just getting over and then emailed me last week. What a loser! I debated about emailing him back, finally did and no response. Whatever. I am ready to send him an email saying, what? you can send an email but you can’t respond to one?!

The second is my friend Bridezilla who can’t take time of her busy schedule to attend the baby shower of one of our closest friends (who by the way has attended every single event for this damn wedding). Nor can she attend my 30th birthday party. But do NOT tell me I need to come down for the wedding DAYS before hand, in my actual b-day to get my damn nails done for YOUR wedding.

Selfish, much?! Either of you!?

gggggggggaaaaaaaaaaaaagggggggggg

mysocalledlife28 — Thu, 21 Feb 2008 06:59:39 +0000

Do you ever feel like you are entirely off base with your life and you’re living in a situation where you’re going against the grain every single day?

Something must be changed in this world b/c it is starting to affect you pretty deeply and affect not just the areas where the bad is, but the happy areas like your friendships and relationships and hobbies and free time.

You wonder if you should consider counseling or is this just situational? And if it is situational how can you try to change your situation? Because you feel like you are trying, but it feels like knocking your head against a brick wall.

You need to be able to make the changes you need to make at work

You need to be able to see the forest through the trees in the meantime.

loml…gone forever?

mysocalledlife28 — Mon, 18 Feb 2008 05:52:35 +0000

So I’ve been thinking a lot about my ex lately…the one from almost 5 years ago… the one who I thought was the love of my life. To me, he seemed the best match out of all the guys I’ve dated (which have been many.) So that gets me wondering if he was the right one and I let him slip away? We didn’t really have a falling out, we just kind of lost touch. I mean, we stayed in touch years after we dated…almost 3, and have just lost touch in the past couple years. He used to have a myspace account but now doesn’t (Or does but it’s under a different email) and about a year ago I emailed him at his old email address and never got a response. This prompted me to think that he doesn’t want to be in touch with me. But not having a response from him was an odd thing, esp. since we talked throughout the times when we were both dating other people. In my email I just asked how he was, short and sweet, but no response. I could try his work email (if he is still working where he was 2 years ago) but otherwise I don’t know how to find him. I guess the worst thing that could happen is that he wouldn’t respond to my email (again.) Is it worth a try so I can put this situation out of my mind? I think I’m going to do it. One of my resolutions was to not to let fear prevent me from doing things. But then again, the door is closed..why open it?